Bachelor blogging w/ Ben Week 5: The Jubilee Breakup

jubileeandbenJubilee&Ben first meet (Via)


Disclaimer: I debated posting this because I just let my fingers type and by the time I got to the end of my thoughts (45 minutes later!) it had turned out to be SO.LONG. ha! I’m choosing to not be embarrassed that I have this much to say on an overall meaningless to my life television show, but it had me feeling some type of way last night so I’m spilling my thoughts. It’s long. You’ve been warned…

Yesterday I talked about dreams and dreaming. That evening I watched the bachelor (complete with a little live tweeting and live texting with my sister Jasmine) and then of course- I dreamed about The Bachelor. It wasn’t about watching The Bachelor though, I was actually IN the bachelor and interestingly enough…it wasn’t about winning anyone’s heart- it was about the relationships between the girls.

When I woke up this morning I figured I had to write about this because I have talked about possibly blogging about this show weekly anyway, but specifically because I mentioned before that I wanted to talk a little bit more about Jubilee. The conversation about Jubilee this season brings up way more than just a beautiful war vet but today, I want to just talk about last night’s break up.

The things that happened last night in the show really struck me.

After the show, on Bachelor Live, Ben mentioned that Jubilee had been pulling back all week. Even with that being said, with what played out in the story, it seemed to me that she was totally in the right to pull back. The reason I feel that way is because the very act of him letting her go (and claiming it was because she was pulling back) did nothing but confirm her suspicions and fears. How do I know this? Because I’ve been right where it appeared Jubilee was last night. You can feel the distance being created by your significant other as they creep away ever so slowly….so you just sort of stay where you are. Maybe not pulling away- but not moving forward because you can feel the difference between someone wanting progress with you or without you.

Even if that wasn’t the case and it really was all in her mind (because sometimes it is), Ben completely neglected to acknowledge that Jubilee had basically been under attack by a large majority of girls (I’m looking at you basically everyone but what- Lauren B., Amanda&Becca?) not all that long ago! Was that supposed to not be effecting her any longer because A WHOLE WEEK had gone by?! A whole week where she had to live with these girls that had tried to gang up on her THE WEEK BEFORE? Ok so maybe I’m not exactly sure of the actual timeline but lets not forget folks, these are not multiple weeks passing between these events in general. We all know this, yes?

The consensus on Bachelor Live was that maybe this experience just “wasn’t for her”. Well, like I said on twitter (@jlynnjustad) I’m not surprised at all that she wasn’t comfortable in that situation. She had pretty much all the girls ganging up on her because she has a sense of humor they didn’t understand and she wasn’t this openly expressive, bubbly person. Not everyone is and that is perfectly okay. Not everyone has to be. Unless you want to have a chance with The Bachelor?

But you know what? I liked Jubilee primarily for this reason:

She wasn’t hanging on every little word Ben said, always acting overjoyed at every little thing then breaking off into smaller groups complaining and talking shit without him around.

She was just her real, honest self, all the time. Was the pressure of The Bachelor situation getting to her? Yup. Just like it was everyone else- she just didn’t hide it behind huge grins and hysterical laughter at every.little.friggin.thing. I mean does Ben seriously think that every single thing he does and says will be as funny after the show as it was during?

It’s also a little strange to me that there are no girls there that even remotely remind me of Kaitlyn. Now, I didn’t see her on her season of The Bachelor, only on The Bachelorette. Does that seem strange to anyone else but me though? I mean, maybe the closest thing would be Caila. I would classify Caila in that “soccer mom who could get along with all the other soccer moms” type that Lauren H. seems to think Ben wants. And that may be true and that’s perfectly okay, too! All I’m saying is- if I was a soccer mom and Jubilee was a soccer mom and our kids played in the same league…I think we would totally get along. I think to make a judgment of someone just because you don’t know them very well and they aren’t the type to just open up and let anyone and everyone be their new bff! just isn’t fair.

It amazes me how these women (and you Bachelor Ben) act like they’ve known each other long enough to truly be able to know each other without walls and expect us to go along with it. But maybe a lot of people do because there were plenty of people on twitter who felt Jubilee was always being awkward or whatever but I don’t think that’s an abnormal response to having to live in a house with a bunch of women you don’t know, who clearly don’t like you and all date the same man. Sure, you should “know what you signed up for” but does that mean that in order to participate on or watch this show you have to go along with thinking it’s strange to want to take time to get to know someone before baring every layer of your soul?!?!

From some conversations on twitter, I don’t seem to be the only one totally confused how Ben could tell Jubilee he loves that she has layers, then let her go because she doesn’t peel them back fast enough. She asked him to not give up on her, he did and then he proceeded to promise Jojo (after she inquired) that she wouldn’t be blindsided. But it was okay to do that to Jubilee? I never thought I would say this but- Bachelor Ben lost some major points with me last night. Maybe the feelings that would cause him to do all this were the reason she was pulling back? Everyone was praising him for being honest with her in that moment but my “been there done that” record book tells me he knew way before he actually told her, so he’s getting no praise from me.

OH YEAAA and also- I just want to take a second to talk about this whole, snatching her hand away thing. I guess I was literally the only one that understood what she was trying to say when she was talking about knowing how it feels to watch other girls with him holding hands and kissing and all that so she didn’t want to do it. I mean, maybe there was a little cat and mouse going on there but I guess like someone mentioned on Twitter….you can’t play hard to get on the bachelor.

I do feel the need to mention though that as much as I loved Jubilee and didn’t see her exit coming so soon, I saw it coming always. I’m currently calling top as Becca, Lauren B., Jennifer, Lauren H. and Caila. Lauren H. impressed me last night but I’m still not over that soccer mom comment and I think (and always have) that Lauren B. is taking the ring home.

Anywayyyyyy. I think that’s the longest I’ve ranted about an insignificant television show but I truly believe that Juiblee was incredibly real and the type of contestant that maybe isn’t the norm on that show…which maybe would make her an excellent candidate for the next Bachelorette…..?


What did you think of last night’s breakup? What do you think of Jubilee as the next Bachelorette? Any predictions on who Ben will get down on one knee for?